Jokes and funny stories

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Re: Jokes and funny stories

Post by Rbjustme on Mon Sep 19, 2016 10:18 pm

Now that is good KM. Thumbs up mate! Applause

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Re: Jokes and funny stories

Post by Peacekeeper on Tue Sep 27, 2016 3:11 pm

Some Aussie Etiquette .....

Never take an open stubby to a job interview.

Even if you are certain you are included in the will it is rude to take the ute and trailer to the funeral.

Don't allow the dog to eat at the table no matter how good his manners are.

When you take a girl out on the first date establish with her parents what time she's expected back.  Some will say 11.00pm others may say Monday, in which case it's the man's responsibility to get her to school on time.

The groom should always rent a tux.  A tracksuit with cummerbund and a clean football jumper can create a tacky appearance.

When sending your wife down the road with a petrol can it's impolite to ask her to bring back beer too!
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Re: Jokes and funny stories

Post by The Ghost on Sun Oct 02, 2016 12:16 pm

Where did you dig that one up from Chewy?? Lol
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Re: Jokes and funny stories

Post by Peacekeeper on Mon Oct 03, 2016 6:00 pm

A friend who I haven't heard from for ages sent it to me ....

If you have to vaccuum the bed it's time to change the sheets

A centrepiece on the dining table should never be something prepared by a taxidermist

While ears need to be cleaned regularly it should be done in private, using one's own car keys!
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Re: Jokes and funny stories

Post by Rbjustme on Wed Oct 05, 2016 8:06 am

Good one PK. Lol

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Re: Jokes and funny stories

Post by Leroy on Fri Oct 14, 2016 12:45 pm

rofl Love it!
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Re: Jokes and funny stories

Post by kelimar on Mon Nov 21, 2016 11:47 am

Sad news at the nestle factory today, a member of staff was seriously injured when a pallet of chocolate fell more than 50 feet and crushed him underneath, he tried in vain to attract attention but every time he shouted "the milky bars are on me" everyone just cheered!!!
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Re: Jokes and funny stories

Post by Rbjustme on Thu Nov 24, 2016 10:02 am

Ha ha, now that's a good one KM. Applause Lol

Wow

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Re: Jokes and funny stories

Post by Rbjustme on Thu Nov 24, 2016 10:07 am

I’d never had surgery, and I was nervous. “This is a very simple, non invasive procedure,” the anaesthesiologist reassured me. I felt better, until … “Heck,” he continued, “you have 
a better chance of dying from the 
anaesthesia than the surgery itself.” affraid

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Re: Jokes and funny stories

Post by kelimar on Sat Dec 03, 2016 5:10 pm

Ha Ha..I'll bet that anaethestist had very few patients!
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